Last year, Timmy and I had decided Nico was old enough to learn to ride his bike without the training wheels. We took them off, tried to help him learn, and after a few tries he insisted on putting them back on.
A few weeks ago Nico decided he no longer wanted the training wheels on his bike. He went to the tool box, picked up tool after tool until he found the right one and took them off himself. A week or so later, he was happily, confidently riding his bike on two wheels.
The moral of this story, kids know when they are ready for something, and it doesn't necessarily correspond to a certain age. Do other kids ride bikes on two wheels at an early age? Sure. Does that mean my kids have to? Nope!
The thing to remember, while unschooling, is that you are letting your kids work on their schedule. Whether it's learning to read, solve complex arithmetic problems, using tools, or riding a bike, they will do it with ease when they are ready. If they are resistant, or hesitant, put the training wheels back on for a while. Let them revisit things at a later date, when they feel more comfortable, and be amazed by how much easier it is for them to learn.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Monday, November 28, 2011
Yet another post about Reading
Nico was taught to read using phonics, so in his mind the only real reading is when words are sounded out. I find it extremely joyful, to watch Lucas take a different approach. Lucas does know some phonics, but that has never been a huge focus, and since no one is actually teaching him to read, he is using more of a natural whole word approach. This led to an argument in the car the other day between me and Nico about what constitutes reading.
See, as we were driving down the road, a Publix bakery truck was riding along beside us. Lucas looked over and said "Look a Publix truck." When I told him good job for reading the side of the truck, Nico insisted that Lucas hadn't read anything, he just recognized the word. But isn't that what reading is; seeing a word and recognizing it? (Granted the color and font of the word probably helped a lot in the recognition, but still, he did recognize it.)
Nico and I argued back and forth about it. Nico insisting that Lucas can't read because he doesn't read the books Nico puts in front of him, and me insisting that he most certainly can read, just not anything and everything just yet. Lucas stayed pretty quiet during this whole discussion. I only continued the conversation for so long because I hate the way Nico is always trying to undermine his confidence, which is probably why Lucas doesn't read out loud more often. Constantly being told you can't do something, leads you to not even wanting to try.
For a kid who can't read, I've seen Lucas recognize an awful lot of words, most often when he thinks no one is paying attention to him.
See, as we were driving down the road, a Publix bakery truck was riding along beside us. Lucas looked over and said "Look a Publix truck." When I told him good job for reading the side of the truck, Nico insisted that Lucas hadn't read anything, he just recognized the word. But isn't that what reading is; seeing a word and recognizing it? (Granted the color and font of the word probably helped a lot in the recognition, but still, he did recognize it.)
Nico and I argued back and forth about it. Nico insisting that Lucas can't read because he doesn't read the books Nico puts in front of him, and me insisting that he most certainly can read, just not anything and everything just yet. Lucas stayed pretty quiet during this whole discussion. I only continued the conversation for so long because I hate the way Nico is always trying to undermine his confidence, which is probably why Lucas doesn't read out loud more often. Constantly being told you can't do something, leads you to not even wanting to try.
For a kid who can't read, I've seen Lucas recognize an awful lot of words, most often when he thinks no one is paying attention to him.
Friday, November 4, 2011
How do you know if/what they're learning?
How do you know what your children are learning? If they never take tests, or get evaluated, how do you know they've learned anything at all? These are common questions people ask when they find out about unschooling. And the answer is so simple, and easy, I can't believe it eludes them.
I know my children are learning, because I pay attention to them. As unschoolers, I spend a lot of time with my children. I may not always be actively engaged with them, as we don't enjoy all the same activities, but I am always aware of where they are and what they are doing. I pick up on the little cues that tell me they are learning, or have mastered a new skill.
Example 1: Nico has been working on figuring out time for quite a while. He was constantly asking what time is it? how long until? and other such questions to help give himself a better understanding of how time moves. I know he is mastering this skill, because he has stopped asking so many questions, and has started making statements about time. In two hours, it will be... Only five minutes until...
Example 2: This morning Lucas read the number 1100, off the playstation screen. He said "Mommy I scored eleven hundred points!" I didn't know he could read numbers that high, so I walked over to check, and sure enough he had scored 1100 points. Now I know.
I know my children are learning, because I pay attention to them. As unschoolers, I spend a lot of time with my children. I may not always be actively engaged with them, as we don't enjoy all the same activities, but I am always aware of where they are and what they are doing. I pick up on the little cues that tell me they are learning, or have mastered a new skill.
Example 1: Nico has been working on figuring out time for quite a while. He was constantly asking what time is it? how long until? and other such questions to help give himself a better understanding of how time moves. I know he is mastering this skill, because he has stopped asking so many questions, and has started making statements about time. In two hours, it will be... Only five minutes until...
Example 2: This morning Lucas read the number 1100, off the playstation screen. He said "Mommy I scored eleven hundred points!" I didn't know he could read numbers that high, so I walked over to check, and sure enough he had scored 1100 points. Now I know.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Unschooling in the media
I just finished watching a segment about unschooling on The Today Show. If you missed it, check here for the video clip. All in all it showed unschooling in a positive light, which is a huge departure from how it's been shown in the past.
I love the Bentley family in the video. They are a wonderful example of how unschooling works. You can tell from watching the video that those girls know themselves. They know their passions and what they want out of life. And that's what unschooling is all about. Mrs. Bentley seems to share my view of the parent's role in unschooling as well. She says, "I consider myself their facilitator. Bringing the world to them and them to the world." And that is exactly how I see myself when it comes to my children's education.
They say that travel is a big part of unschooling, which leads host Matt Lauer to speculate that only the wealthy can do it. Not true. You don't have to be wealthy to travel, you just have to make good choices. Also traveling doesn't have to mean going out of the country. It can be as simple as driving an hour away to your state park. People who choose to unschool make the choice that travel is important to them, so they make the sacrifices necessary to make it happen.
It was mentioned that unschooling is not right for every family, and to some extent I would agree with that, but not for the reasons they said. It was stated that only children who are self-motivated and self-propelled can be unschooled. I would argue that all children are self-motivated and self-propelled, and it's only after spending years in a classroom, that they start to lose those qualities.
There were a few points made by the 'experts' and by host Matt Lauer that kind of got my blood boiling. Take their many references to the fundamentals. "Will there be gaps in the fundamentals." People, there's a reason they're called the fundamentals. You can't escape learning about them. No matter what your goals and passions are, the basics are there. You don't need to sit in a classroom, eight hours a day, five days a week, for twelve years, to learn them.
One statement that Matt Lauer made, and one of the so-called experts touched on too, was this gem. "If they aren't assessed, how do we judge and compare them to other kids their own age?" And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what is most wrong with our school system. This idea that you can only know if a child is learning by comparing them to others. It's not good enough to just compare them against themselves. The idea that only tests and assessments can demonstrate learning is ridiculous.
I love the Bentley family in the video. They are a wonderful example of how unschooling works. You can tell from watching the video that those girls know themselves. They know their passions and what they want out of life. And that's what unschooling is all about. Mrs. Bentley seems to share my view of the parent's role in unschooling as well. She says, "I consider myself their facilitator. Bringing the world to them and them to the world." And that is exactly how I see myself when it comes to my children's education.
They say that travel is a big part of unschooling, which leads host Matt Lauer to speculate that only the wealthy can do it. Not true. You don't have to be wealthy to travel, you just have to make good choices. Also traveling doesn't have to mean going out of the country. It can be as simple as driving an hour away to your state park. People who choose to unschool make the choice that travel is important to them, so they make the sacrifices necessary to make it happen.
It was mentioned that unschooling is not right for every family, and to some extent I would agree with that, but not for the reasons they said. It was stated that only children who are self-motivated and self-propelled can be unschooled. I would argue that all children are self-motivated and self-propelled, and it's only after spending years in a classroom, that they start to lose those qualities.
There were a few points made by the 'experts' and by host Matt Lauer that kind of got my blood boiling. Take their many references to the fundamentals. "Will there be gaps in the fundamentals." People, there's a reason they're called the fundamentals. You can't escape learning about them. No matter what your goals and passions are, the basics are there. You don't need to sit in a classroom, eight hours a day, five days a week, for twelve years, to learn them.
One statement that Matt Lauer made, and one of the so-called experts touched on too, was this gem. "If they aren't assessed, how do we judge and compare them to other kids their own age?" And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what is most wrong with our school system. This idea that you can only know if a child is learning by comparing them to others. It's not good enough to just compare them against themselves. The idea that only tests and assessments can demonstrate learning is ridiculous.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Concerts and Comic books
Timmy and I took the boys to the Bob Carr Performing Arts Center to see the Orlando Philharmonic Young People's Concert. Nico and Lucas had never been to a concert like this before, and I wanted to be sure to expose them to it at-least once. The full orchestra was on stage, and we learned all about a few American composers, and what makes music American.
Although I enjoyed the concert, and would like to return again next year, no one else really did. Timmy said we were sitting on the wrong side of the theatre. Too close to the drums and base, and he would rather have been closer to the violins.
Nico sat pretty quietly during most of it, but at the end confessed that he was bored and didn't want to attend anything like this again.
Lucas was restless from the very beginning. Complaining that it was too loud, while all the performers warmed up their instruments. Then he squirmed so much in his seat that I eventually scooped him up onto my lap. He turned his back on the stage, and told me repeatedly that he was all done, and ready to go. He too has said he doesn't want to attend anything like this again.
Ah well, at-least I tried to introduce them to a little culture.
On a side note, I have been thinking for a while about introducing the boys to comic books, hoping it might spark a bit of reading. As luck would have it, one of our neighbors dropped by and gave Timmy a stack of about 60 comic books from the early 90's. They include some Wolverine, Spiderman, Predator, Terminator and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle comics. I've left them on a side table in the living room, and Lucas was the first to pick one up.
Yesterday he started thumbing through a Terminator one. Nico wandered over and tried to read it to him. He came across one word that he didn't know, and gave up. (He does the same thing when trying to read a book.) Lucas still likes to look through the comics, so I'm still holding out hope that they may spark some interest in reading. At-least I didn't have to spend any money this time.
Although I enjoyed the concert, and would like to return again next year, no one else really did. Timmy said we were sitting on the wrong side of the theatre. Too close to the drums and base, and he would rather have been closer to the violins.
Nico sat pretty quietly during most of it, but at the end confessed that he was bored and didn't want to attend anything like this again.
Lucas was restless from the very beginning. Complaining that it was too loud, while all the performers warmed up their instruments. Then he squirmed so much in his seat that I eventually scooped him up onto my lap. He turned his back on the stage, and told me repeatedly that he was all done, and ready to go. He too has said he doesn't want to attend anything like this again.
Ah well, at-least I tried to introduce them to a little culture.
On a side note, I have been thinking for a while about introducing the boys to comic books, hoping it might spark a bit of reading. As luck would have it, one of our neighbors dropped by and gave Timmy a stack of about 60 comic books from the early 90's. They include some Wolverine, Spiderman, Predator, Terminator and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle comics. I've left them on a side table in the living room, and Lucas was the first to pick one up.
Yesterday he started thumbing through a Terminator one. Nico wandered over and tried to read it to him. He came across one word that he didn't know, and gave up. (He does the same thing when trying to read a book.) Lucas still likes to look through the comics, so I'm still holding out hope that they may spark some interest in reading. At-least I didn't have to spend any money this time.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Letting them figure it out...
It's sometimes hard for me to sit back and just let my kids figure things out for themselves. Especially when I know a quicker, better way of doing things. In those moments, I need to remind myself of how I feel when others try and tell me how to do something that I know I can figure out on my own. (Timmy is particularly fond of giving me driving directions, even though I know where I'm going. I may not always take the quickest route, but I'll get us there eventually.)
When Nico started doing the laundry for me a few weeks ago, I showed him how to turn on the machines. I explained about how to balance the loads, so it doesn't make that loud banging sound. But I never showed him how to fold the clothes once they were dry. That is something I left for him to figure out on his own. This was particularly hard for me, since I banished Timmy from helping with the laundry years ago, because I hated the way he folded my clothes.
Let me tell you, Nico has come up with some creative ways of folding. He only does the kids' clothes, so I refrain from re-folding everything my way. I'm trying to remind myself that my way, isn't always right for everyone, and I need to let my kids find their way of doing things.
When Nico started doing the laundry for me a few weeks ago, I showed him how to turn on the machines. I explained about how to balance the loads, so it doesn't make that loud banging sound. But I never showed him how to fold the clothes once they were dry. That is something I left for him to figure out on his own. This was particularly hard for me, since I banished Timmy from helping with the laundry years ago, because I hated the way he folded my clothes.
Let me tell you, Nico has come up with some creative ways of folding. He only does the kids' clothes, so I refrain from re-folding everything my way. I'm trying to remind myself that my way, isn't always right for everyone, and I need to let my kids find their way of doing things.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Allowance
A couple weeks ago, Nico asked if he could start receiving a weekly allowance. I told him most kids who get an allowance do something around the house to earn it.
After some discussion, Nico and I agreed on $5 a week in exchange for him doing the laundry. (Not all the laundry, just the kid's clothes.) Lucas wanted to get in on this whole allowance thing as well, and we agreed on $2 a week for dusting.
It's been three weeks, and they haven't given up on it yet. As I'm typing this Nico is putting his clothes in the dryer, and getting ready to start a second load in the washer. I really thought this would be another passing interest, like everything else they do, and I am pleasantly surprised. It's nice to have a little help around the house, even if I do have to pay for it.
After some discussion, Nico and I agreed on $5 a week in exchange for him doing the laundry. (Not all the laundry, just the kid's clothes.) Lucas wanted to get in on this whole allowance thing as well, and we agreed on $2 a week for dusting.
It's been three weeks, and they haven't given up on it yet. As I'm typing this Nico is putting his clothes in the dryer, and getting ready to start a second load in the washer. I really thought this would be another passing interest, like everything else they do, and I am pleasantly surprised. It's nice to have a little help around the house, even if I do have to pay for it.
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